Incomplete

I’ve an infallible strategic plan: Be Happy

…Many days it is too difficult for me to empower myself and be as strong than I need to be, because I’ve discovered that I can be very quick to go from anger to sadness and from sadness to frustration.

Missing is the most sublime feeling that exists, because in my opinion, you miss when you need or when you really love, but it hurts so much that sometimes anger is part of a defense mechanism that we carry inside.

We all want to be happy, seek and fight the comfort and live a full life; in words it is something easy to achieve for the creation of a perfect phrase, in real life, when they talk to you about sacrifices on the way no one tells you about the people you try not to leave behind and that you end up moving away from them.

The days go by and obstacles that do not depend on you directly limit your hugs and with it your heart slowly suffers.

The mind betrays you, some days you feel capable of eat the entire world; however; others days you just want to hide from everything and everyone and stop feeling bad.

What you can do those days that you feel that you can’t take it anymore? that you are incomplete, that your life is at the expense of the moments you lose with important people for you. How should you react to feeling a little guilty when you are a little happy? When you try with all your might not to fall into a depressing situation. Where the fuck are the defense mechanisms in that moment when the tears don’t stop and you feel weak?

Incomplete, I am sadly incomplete, I put myself in the place where I am, no one else did it and in the middle of my chest I have an immense emptiness that is taking too long to fill and it frustrates me to know that the day I fill it again I’ll still have missed many important moments in which I should have been.

I must stop keeping so many things inside myself, that sooner or later they surface on the skin like a waterfall full of different emotions and then at that moment everything together drives me crazy. It will always be like this until it is complete

I think we should allow ourselves to feel, even if we live pretending that we are strong. I must allow myself to be weak today, tomorrow I will continue with the plan and I will be happy….