Big woman

I've always been a big woman

Big hands

Big tummy

Big back

Big curly hair

Big lips

And a round face

So, i always had a lot

In some point of my life i learned that my bigness was bad

Bad for my body

Bad or my health

And bad for others sight,

Beacuse the unbeauty it's supposed to be shame

It's expected to be hide

I believed it, so i turned bigger

I ate the loneliness and the insults just for being the body i am

And let it sink in my guts

I was full

Full of embarrasment

Full of hate

Full of fear

but hungry for understandment

So beyond all the layers of fat and skin i am, i hope someone will see

That i will see the muchness i have it's not a threat

it´s in invitation into my sensitive mind

A Big woman,

with a big love

A Big talent

A Big laugh

Big light

A big woman that's much more than body because of her big heart

But it seems that i´ve have grown so many layers

That i´m just too big to wear a pretty dress

or to live in someone´s mind

To be in someone´s heart.

In anyway, my stubbornness is equivalent to my bigness

So i´ll keep waiting for a dress that fits me

For my own heart to embrace me

and eventually, someone who doesn´t perceive me as "too much"